


Heir of Ash and Fire

by commandershakarian



Series: Heir of Ash and Fire [8]
Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blue Suns, Explicit Language, F/F, Mercenaries
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-17
Updated: 2018-11-16
Packaged: 2019-08-03 16:28:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16329548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/commandershakarian/pseuds/commandershakarian
Summary: Commander Charley Shepard wasn’t always an Alliance soldier. She was a colony kid, a mercenary. She was a weapon. And she wanted revenge.





	1. Last Day on Mindoir

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "She was the heir of ash and fire, and she would bow to no one." — Sarah J. Maas, Heir of Fire

Hooves thundered beneath her as the air whipped through her hair. Tightening her grip on the reins, she rose up slightly on her toes, a smile spreading across her face at the freedom. Here she was herself, away from the prying eyes of the other colonists, away from the expectations of her parents. To have a creature as magnificent as Atlas at her command gave her a sense of power she didn’t feel anywhere else. She was both master and friend to her steed. She had a connection with Atlas that she didn’t have with any other human: not with her twin sister, not with her best friend. The horse knew her just as well as she knew him.

Betsy chased them at a distance. The dog wasn’t as spry as she used to be, but she tried the best she could to keep up with the horse. Charley slowed Atlas down as they came to the gates of her parents small parcel of land. Summer had come early this year. The farm had already began producing and her father could barely keep up with the demands from town.

Even after he’d hired the two extra farmhands, he still couldn’t keep up. Some days, Charley and her sister would toil in the dirt with them, but the weather had turned brutally hot. Her father refused to let her work in it, saying it was too dangerous to exert herself. Even after riding for the short period she had, sweat coated her skin, leaving her feeling cool despite the noonday sun. Shading her eyes, she could see Rebecca leaning against the barn, a book in her hands and a straw hat on her head. Her ebony waves tumbled over her tanned shoulders, the same waves Charley kept braided and out of the way.

Wiping the sweat from her forehead, Charley slid from Atlas’ back to the dusty ground. Taking a hold of the reins, she lead the horse towards the stables, keeping pace beside him easily. Ticking off the list of things she had to do to care for Atlas, she almost didn’t hear her mother calling her name.

“Charlotte!”

The shout barely reached her over the distance between the house and the stables. Turning, she squinted her eyes against the sun until she could see the figure of her mother waving at her.

“What?!” She shouted back, irritated that she couldn’t do one thing without being pestered about something. 

“Charlotte! Rebecca!” Her mom was still waving, but this time, Charley noticed she was running. “Run!”

Something about the way her mother said the final word was strange. Run?

The sound of a gunshot echoed in the near silence. The world moved in slow motion as her mother dropped to the ground. When she didn’t get back up, Charley felt her entire world tip. The sounds of her sister’s screams jarred her back into reality and she knew that no matter what happened, she had to protect Becca.

The reins fell from her hands, any thought of possibly saving Atlas gone from her mind. There was no way that the horse would make it if raiders were attacking the farm. Besides, as much as she loved him, the horse could be replaced. Her family couldn’t.

Her feet carried her to the barn where her sister stood, screaming with tears running down her face. Grabbing Rebecca by the arm, she covered her mouth with her free hand, cutting off the noise. She pulled her sister into the relative safety of the barn, releasing her to bolt the door behind her. When she turned around again, she saw her sister curled up on the ground, her arms around her knees, soft sobs coming from her chest. Charley’s heart lurched at the sight. Their mother was dead. Dead. For doing nothing more than existing. Leaning against the door, Charley fought the tears that threatened. She could mourn her mother later. Her father was still out there somewhere, unaware of what had happened.

Charley searched the contents of the barn quickly before she found her father’s hunting rifle standing up against the farthest wall. He hadn’t put it away after he’d gone hunting the night before and Charley was grateful for his forgetfulness. She lifted the gun and had decided to get Rebecca on her feet when something, or someone, charged the door. It shook the walls, hay and dirt falling from overhead. Shouts came from outside. Men. Men who weren’t human. They were speaking in an alien tongue, one that Charley didn’t know.

Becca had gone silent at the voices, fear freezing her where she sat. Biting the inside of her cheek, Charley tried to gain control of herself, of her fear, before hurrying forward and pulling her sister to her feet. They wouldn’t get past Charley. She would put a bullet in the head of every fucker that walked through that door.

Betsy’s growls were followed by a shout and a gunshot. She was silent after. Anger replaced the fear in Charley. She didn’t care who these people were anymore. They come to her colony, kill her mother, her dog, and attempt to get at her. She was going to enjoy ending their lives. Becca cried out, the loss of the people she loved most making it impossible for her to think clearly.

Charley pulled the hammer back on the gun, preparing it for the inevitable. She was expecting them to break the door down, and when they did, she’d unload her weapon into them. What she didn’t expected was the fire. She hadn’t noticed it at first, her attention fixed at the entrance to the barn, but when Becca cried out again, she noticed the white smoke coming from the back. The hay was dried out because of the hot weather so it caught ablaze quickly.

Rebecca ran for the front of the barn, unbolting the door and disappearing. Coughing against the poisonous fumes, Charley stumbled out of the building, her eyes searching for both enemies and her sister at the same time. She hoped to see one or the other, but not both. Her wishes went unheard. Both stood only a few feet away.

The men who stood over her sister were grotesque. Their foreheads bulged, their gray skin pulled taut over their bodies. Too many eyes, as black as the coal her father burned in the winter, watched her sister struggle to get on her knees. Then they laughed.

Rebecca was sobbing, blood dripping from the wound on her head where they must have hit her with a gun. It dripped into her eyes as she tried to pull herself away, shaking in terror. Charley stopped thinking in that moment. She ran toward the aliens, her intention to murder every one of them, to tear them limb from limb, to watch their blood stain the dusty ground beneath them as they struggled for their last breaths.

One of them noticed her coming. He shouted, lifted his gun, prepared to end her life if she proved too much of a fight. Rebecca screamed, Charley’s name on her tongue. Lifting her father’s rifle, Charley prepared to fire off a shot. She didn’t get the chance to.

She hit the ground, dazed, her vision going black for a moment. When her eyes adjusted, she felt a throbbing pain in the back of her head. One of her mother’s murderers stood over her, a gun in his hand, her blood dripping from the metal. She stared into its eyes, her stomach rolling with nausea. She wanted to vomit, but she refused to look away. Her vision blurred when a sudden sharp pain pulsed through her skull. She almost lost consciousness from the intensity of it and had to close her eyes to regain herself.

Becca’s screams faded as one of the men dragged her away. Charley could see the blood on the grass beside her. Was it hers or Becca’s? She didn’t know. Anger filled her again. They’d better fucking kill her or she would rip them apart. Grabbing a handful of dirt, she weighed it in her hand carefully. Then she tossed it.

The alien shouted in pain, trying to get the particles of dust out of his vision. As he flailed around, Charley began to crawl for the gun he’d dropped, but she wasn’t fast enough. A kick to the ribs put her back on the ground, this time struggling for air. One of the aliens stood over her and lifted his gun.

Charley lost consciousness as the sound of gunfire filled the air.


	2. Helluva Left Hook

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "She was brave and strong and broken all at once." — Anna Funder, Stasiland

Darkness. It was what Charley woke to. At least, she assumed she was awake. Her mind was conscious, but her eyes were closed and she couldn’t find the strength to open them. Her ears rang, a consequence of the noisy gunshots earlier. Was it earlier? For all she knew, it could have been days, weeks ago. Perhaps longer. Time meant nothing to her as she lay in darkness, pain throbbing in her temple, unable to move. Maybe she was dead. If she was, she didn’t think dying hurt  _ this  _ much.

“You should have left her.”

The voice was forceful, angry. But she couldn’t hear it clearly, as if the speaker was standing in a tunnel. Tunnel? Maybe that's where they were.

“She’s a goddamn kid, Vido.” Another voice, this one rougher yet somehow comforting. “I wasn’t leaving her behind.”

The men continued to argue, but Charley stopped listening. The pain in her skull was worsening. Squeezing her eyes tightly, she breathed slowly through her nose, trying to will the pain away, but she had taken a bad blow to her head. The gun had most likely cracked the skull and would need medical attention soon. If she lasted long enough to find a doctor, that is.

A pained groan left her mouth.

The men fell silent. Charley’s heart fluttered nervously in her chest when she heard movement to her right. She was prepared for the worst case scenario. These men could have been the same ones who killed her mother, kidnapped her sister, did God only knows what to her father. She feared for her life, but would die before she left them have her.

“Hey, kid. Can ya hear me?” The rough voice hovered above her, but she couldn’t determine is exact position. It didn’t matter. She didn’t have a choice. It was do or die, and she was not going down without a fight.

Her lack of a response infuriated the man on the opposite side of the room. “Stop fucking around.”

The man beside her sighed and muttered something under his breath. She felt him move slightly, probably turning to address his friend. Charley’s left hand closed into as tight of a fist as she could manage in her injured state. Taking the risk, she threw the punch in the man’s general direction. She felt a slight rush of adrenaline when her fist connected with the side of his face.

_ Crunch. _

Then came the pain.

Her eyes flew open as she screamed.

The man she had punched stared at her dumbly as tears filled her eyes. He was human. Both men were. Nothing like those assholes who'd destroyed her family…

Her vision blurred as a wave of dizziness took her. A strong hand gripped her arm and kept her upright until she could focus again. The pain in her hand was intense, much worse than her head, and she hoped that they would kill her after all.

“Holy shit, that was a helluva left hook, kid.”

Charley blinked a few times to clear her vision. A pair of hardened blue eyes peered out of a world-weary face. His inky hair was graying at the roots, his cheeks were pockmarked and he wore a savage scar on his neck. Charley flinched at the jagged look to it, wondering how he’d gotten it and how he'd managed to survive.

The scarred man frowned when she didn’t speak. “You ok? Is it out of your system now? I can’t afford to be blindsided again.”

Charley glared at him. “ _ Fuck you. _ ”

“Kitty’s got claws.” The man on the other side of the room said, laughing. He was dark-haired as well, but slightly younger. Or at the very least, life hadn’t been as tough on him. He smirked at her and she already knew that she was going to cut his eyes out of his face. Then he wouldn’t be able to look at her again.

“Vido.  _ Leave. _ ”

“Fine. Let me know whenever you’re finished. We’ve got to get off this shit planet.” Vido disappeared through a door that Charley hadn’t noticed before. As it clicked behind him, silence returned to the room.

She slumped against the wall behind her, any fight she had a moment ago gone with any remnants of energy. The hair that had once been secured in two braids was now curling over her shoulders. Crusted blood stained the cot she was laying on and she almost felt bad about it. Reaching up with her uninjured hand, she felt the place on her head where she’d been hit. It was tender to the touch and agony took her the moment her fingers brushed the wound. She hissed in a breath and closed her eyes.

“The trick is to breathe slowly through your mouth.” The scarred man was calm, almost serene. She hadn’t expected him to be helpful. Or kind. Strangers were rarely kind.

Her pride told her to ignore him and his advice, but her common sense won out. Pride had gotten her wounded enough for one day. Taking a deep breath, she followed his directions and already felt better, the dizziness subsiding slightly. He watched her in silence.

After another breath, she met his inquiring gaze. “You saved my life.”

A flicker of a smile crossed his face, but he didn’t let it stick. “You did pretty well on your own. How old are you?”

“Sixteen.”

“Sixteen? And you were willing to go up against a group of batarian slavers? By yourself?” The man whistled, impressed by her foolish actions on Mindoir. That was certainly a… surprise. “I’ve been a mercenary for a long time and I’ve never seen anything quite like that.”

“I almost got myself killed.” She said, furious at her stupidity, furious at this stranger and how impressed he seemed to be with her. “I couldn’t even protect my sister. They took her.”

“Listen to me, kid. Those assholes would have killed you. Or maybe they would have knocked you out and sold you to the highest bidder. Who knows? Do you know what’s important?”

Charley shook her head and immediately regretted it. She rubbed the bridge of her nose and waited for the dizziness to pass. When it finally disappeared, she returned her gaze to the mercenary.

“You fought for something. You wanted to save your sister. You wanted to save yourself. And that’s admirable. But the most important part was you were willing to die for something and most people would have run before doing that.” He snorted and patted her shoulder in an attempt to be comforting. “That’s not nothing.”

“But I failed.”

“You won't next time.” He ignored her when she attempted to protest. “What’s your name?”

“Charley.”

The scarred man nodded, stowing her name away in his mind. “Charley. How’d ya like to get revenge on the fuckers that hurt your family?”

Charley’s eyes widened at the prospect. To be able to hunt down these ‘batarians’ and make them pay for everything they’d done on Mindoir, to her family, to the colony. For all of those people who were either murdered or kidnapped, if she couldn’t save them, she could avenge them.

“I’d like that very much.”

The man stood, seemingly happy with her response. “I thought so. Let me get a medic to check you over and we can discuss it in more detail.”

As he walked towards the exit, Charley called out to him. “You know my name. What’s yours?”

Pausing briefly, he glanced over his shoulder, the smile on his face the first genuine one she’d seen during their entire conversation. “Name’s Zaeed Massani.”


	3. In Memoriam

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “And in the silence I suddenly understood the many ways a person can die but still be alive.” — Carmen Rodrigues, “34 Pieces of You”

The attack on Mindoir had been days ago and Charley hadn’t seen Zaeed since. The mercenary ship had managed to evade the Alliance soldiers looking for whomever or whatever had destroyed the colony. Now they were drifting in the middle of nowhere. The doctor that had taken care of her injuries mentioned that the entire colony had been decimated. No survivors.

People were still missing. The slavers had taken everyone they could and killed the rest. Charley had hoped for some good news. Maybe her father had survived. Maybe her sister had been left behind. The doctor had only given her a sympathetic look before leaving her to ponder his words.

That look said everything she didn’t want to hear: There was no hope. Not out here in the Traverse.

She sat in the mess hall, the men and women of the Blue Suns mercenary group ignoring her for all they could. She was a kid, an outcast. Most of them gave her sad looks whenever they thought she wasn’t looking. But Charley was always watching. She wouldn’t let what happened on Mindoir happen again. She wouldn’t let another person surprise her again.

The food on her plate was cold. It had looked inedible before, but now it didn’t even resemble what the cook claimed it was. Her dizzy spells had decreased greatly and because of that, the doctor let her roam the ship as she pleased. There was only so much a sixteen year old could do on a spaceship before it became boring, however. Sighing, she pushed her tray away and slumped in the chair. She’d give anything to have something to do.

“Hey! Kid! Been lookin’ for you.”

The voice was a welcomed sound which was strange in itself. This man may have saved her life, but she didn’t know him. He was a stranger and there was so much she didn’t understand. Why had he been on Mindoir? Why did he care about some sixteen year old he didn’t even know? What did he gain from saving her life? People never did anything without an ulterior motive. This was a lesson she knew well.

Zaeed Massani slid into the chair across from her. Taking one look at her food, he scrunched up his nose in disgust and dumped the tray on the floor. “The shit they serve us is… well, shit.”

Charley crossed her arms over her chest, not smiling although it was difficult not to. While she agreed with his assertion about the food, she wanted answers and she’d be damned if he didn’t give them.

Zaeed saw the glare and didn’t hesitate to grin. “Got some fire in you, huh?”

When she didn’t react to his statement the way he’d expected, Zaeed rubbed the back of his neck, uncomfortable by the open distrust on her face. Finally, he sighed in defeat. “You probably have questions.”

“There’s only one I want explained. The rest can wait.” Charley replied, placing her hands on the table, her left hand sporting a white cast. Zaeed’s blue eyes moved to the plaster, a frown pulling at his lips. She leaned forward slightly and forced him to meet her gaze. Her father had always taught her to make the person she was confronting meet her eyes. If they wouldn’t, they weren’t trustworthy.

Zaeed met her eyes and didn’t waver.

“Why did you save my life?”

Lifting his eyebrows in surprise, the mercenary hesitated. Charley didn’t like the implications that hesitation held, but she stayed her tongue, reserving judgment until after he’d spoken. A few seconds passed, but to Charley, they felt so much longer. “Did you want to die on Mindoir?”

Charley glanced at the cast on her hand, the bones beneath the plaster throbbing. She’d refused the pain killer, not willing to be drugged on a spaceship full of mercenaries. She was beginning to regret that decision. But his question had struck a nerve. Did she truly wish to be dead beside her mother, her flesh burning in the flames that had consumed their farm? Or did she want to be a prisoner to the slavers like her twin? She honestly couldn’t decide what her heart wanted.

“Maybe? It would be easier. Then I wouldn’t feel like this,” she whispered.

Zaeed watched her in silence, giving her the necessary time to process the confusing and conflicting emotions within her. When she didn’t speak again, the mercenary reached into his jacket pocket.

His set an object on the table between them. Pushing the chair away, the legs scratching against the ground with a grating sound, Zaeed stood to leave. He paused beside her chair, placing a hand on her shoulder and squeezing lightly. It was his chosen attempt to comfort her. He left without a word, the object he’d placed on the table mocking her.

The bracelet sparkled in the bright lights of the cafeteria. From where she sat, Charley could see the familiar horseshoe charm. Without lifting it, she knew what other charms the piece of jewelry would reveal to her. Biting her lip, Charley reached out slowly, afraid to touch it. Her hand hovered above the bracelet, her first memory of its presence replaying in her mind.

...

The ugly yellow of the jewelry shone brightly in the low lamplight. Night had fallen early, a sign of the coming winter. Charley didn’t like jewelry, never had, but it bothered her that her parents had given something to Rebecca and not her. The only charm the bracelet held was a horseshoe, something that symbolized who they were, her father had said. Horses and the Shepard family, everyone on Mindoir associated them together.

“It’s ugly.” Charley snapped, glaring at the happy expression on her twin’s face as she clipped it to her wrist.

Rebecca’s emerald eyes glanced up, the only feature that was different between them, when the bracelet slipped from her fingers and landed on the floor with a tinkling sound. Huffing in irritation, she leaned down to retrieve it. “It’s not ugly, Lottie. You’re just jealous.”

“Am not.”

“Ladies, please behave.” Their mother begged of them, ruffling the hair on Becca’s head before tugging on one of Charley’s braids. “Your father worked hard to afford that for your sister, Charlotte. Can you at least act happy for her?”

Charley crossed her arms over her chest, hating how her mother wielded guilt like a master swordsman. “Yes, Momma.”

“Say something nice about the bracelet.” Her mother instructed her as she returned to the kitchen, intending to finish preparing their evening meal.

With a groan, Charley tried to find something to say about the wretched piece of jewelry. “It’s, uhm, it’s… well, the horseshoe is pretty.”

“See? Was that so hard, Charlotte?” Their mother said with a smile, her green eyes showing how amusing she found the entire situation.

“Yes.” She muttered to no one but herself. Her sister, however, was grinning as if Charley’s words had brought her happiness. As Becca finally managed to clip the bracelet around her wrist, Charley admitted that maybe she liked making her sister happy. Maybe just a little.

...

The bracelet weighed almost nothing in her hand. The gold plating had worn down over the years, exposing the nickel beneath. More charms had been added to it, leaving barely any room for many more. Becca had added things like flowers, books, and ballet slippers: things that she’d done as she grew up. Charley’s eyes took a silent count of each one before realizing that a charm was missing.

Charley had bought her sister a charm on their fourteenth birthday with Becca’s name printed on it. It was gone, the clasp that had once held it broken. In reality, the object in her hand meant nothing to her. It was something dumb that her sister had enjoyed, but as she stared at it, it was as if Becca was still beside her, her beautiful laugh filling the open air of the fields surrounding their home.

Closing her fist tightly around the bracelet, tears stung Charley’s eyes. Slavers had taken something precious to her, but she hadn’t realized how precious until it was gone. She vowed not to make that mistake again.


	4. Survivor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content Warning: This chapter has excessive violence and the allusion to attempted rape. Please be warned.
> 
> "Things have to go on. Grief can’t defeat you.” — Robert Enke

The bathroom was silent. Charley had desperately needed the silence after weeks aboard the spaceship. Steam rose as hot water filled the sink, fogging the mirror hanging on the wall. Reaching forward, she wiped her hand across the glass, watching as her reflection appeared. She looked haggard, almost as if she was hovering somewhere between life and death. At the very least her appearance reflected how she felt. Her eyes were sunken, dark circles etched into the thin skin below them. The freckles that dotted her nose and cheeks were discolored, her olive skin looking pale.

In conclusion, she looked like hell.

The humidity from the steam curled her ebony hair as it tumbled over her shoulders. With her left hand broken, she was unable to braid her hair like she usually did. Now, it was a tangled mess, filthy from so much time unwashed.

In a few hours, the ship would land on Omega, the space station that was the main trading hub of the Terminus systems. Vido Santiago had announced earlier in the evening that their time on Omega would provide some “much needed fun” before the mercenaries headed deeper into the Terminus Systems. She really didn’t give a shit what the mercs did to unwind. As long as they left her alone, she wouldn’t worry about them.

Zaeed had told her that this was the last stop for her. On Omega, she would be able to charter a ship to take to the Citadel. From there, she could do whatever she wanted. Maybe get a job. Maybe find some information on the batarians that attacked Mindoir. Maybe find if she had family left in the galaxy.

Her immediate response was: I don’t have a family.

Zaeed hadn’t questioned her. The destruction of her colony was fresh on her mind, eating away at her. By the time he’d walked away from the conversation, she was of a mind that she would die in the Terminus systems. After Mindoir, she didn’t know if she wanted to survive, to find her father’s family. They would already assume her dead. Why not just be dead?

Closing her eyes, Charley could see the image of herself in the mirror. Without her parents, without Becca, without Mindoir, who was she? What was she? Nothing, but a lost, scared child who had nothing left in the universe. She would die in the Terminus Systems as the nothing she was.

The restroom door opened, the sound of laughter bouncing around as a few people entered. The sound made her head hurt. Realizing that she’d have to find a new hiding place, she shut the water off and turned, prepared to exit. Her path was blocked by one of the men. When she tried to circle around him, he continued to block her. Charley lifted her gaze to identify the idiot.

He was about eighteen years old or so, not much older than her. Average for a human. Boring wavy brunette hair that fell into an equally boring pair of blue eyes. No blemishes on his pale skin, no scars that might tell a story. How he’d even gotten into the Blue Suns was a mystery to her. It was hard to miss the man’s overbearing cologne. Closing her eyes again, she took a deep breath, willing the oncoming headache to disappear.

“Well, well, what do we have here?” His voice was cocky, infuriating. Charley had grown up on a farm, but she wasn’t an idiot. She knew what kind of people mercenaries were and this one was more of a thug than a merc. “A pretty little thing, eh boys?”

The two men standing behind him sneered at her yet somehow managed a laugh at his inquiry. The implications behind the question were obvious and Charley wasn’t going to be a victim. Not again. Mindoir was the last time anyone was going to hurt her.

She tightened her uninjured hand into a fist. “Back. Off.”

His eyes widened at her tone, surprised that she had fight in her. His companions, clearly not as stupid as he was, moved away nervously. “Oh, so you want to play it like that?”

“Vosque.” One of the others said in a quiet voice, looking ready to flee. The fury in Charley’s eyes combined with her physical appearance must have been terrifying in the darkened bathroom. “We should probably go.”

“Look, I tried to be a nice guy about it, give you a chance to say yes, but if you aren’t going to play-”

“I said beat it.” She snapped, golden-brown eyes narrowing, her small nose scrunching in annoyance. If he didn’t leave, Zaeed was going to have to get someone to clean his blood up off of the floor. Maybe even brain matter if he kept pushing.

The guy didn’t heed the warning. When he reached out for her, Charley’s right hand snapped up, gripping his wrist and twisting it away from her. When he howled in pain, she kicked him in the shin, dropping him to his knees. Releasing his wrist, she then grabbed a handful of his hair and smashed his face into the closest bathroom stall door.

Blood burst from his nose, spraying his shirt and the floor, his screams echoing in the small space. Clutching his face, the man toppled to the floor, pain the only thing on his mind now. His friends stared at the bloody scene in shock, neither moving to help him or to hurt Charley.

With a well aimed kick to his side as he lay on the ground, she spat, “Maybe next time, you’ll realize that no means no,  _ asshole _ .”

The door burst open, revealing a group of older mercs, all with guns drawn. At the sight of Charley standing over the bleeding teenager, they paused. A few long seconds passed while Charley stared at the intruding group and they stared at her, both unsure of how to proceed. Then Vido and Zaeed made their entrances.

“What is going-  _ holy shit! _ ” Vido stopped in the doorway when he saw the blood. He turned angry eyes on Charley, pointing at the kid still crying on the floor. “Explain yourself!”

Zaeed assessed the situation in silence, his light blue eyes taking everything in.

The teenager who had attacked her pulled his hand from his face. Charley could see that his nose was broken, the blood pooling beneath the skin as it began to bruise. She couldn’t help smirking at the irate expression on his face. “That bitch attacked me! She fucking came onto me and then attacked me!”

Charley kicked him in the ribs, harder than she had before. He cursed before spitting blood on the floor at her feet. Vido raised a gun in her direction.

“Don’t fucking move.” He hissed, his eyes narrowing dangerously. He wasn’t joking and for the first time since Mindoir, Charley actually believed she would die.

“Vido, stop.” Zaeed put a hand on the gun and waited for Vido to relinquish it. When the latter finally did, Zaeed dropped the clip on the floor before tucking the unloaded gun into his waistband. “Everyone can fucking leave now.”

The mercenaries cleared out, some helping the jackass off of the floor and to the medical bay. Vido was the last to leave, aiming a glare at both Charley and Zaeed, before disappearing down the hall with the rest. As silence descended upon them, the old merc rubbed his hands over his face and sighed. Did he really want her to not defend herself?

“He tried to touch me. I stopped him.” Those were the only words that would come from her mouth. They were the only ones she was willing to say.

Zaeed dropped his hands and met her eyes. He searched for something in her gaze, the truth maybe, and whatever he found eased his worries. A smile returned to his face. “Good. I’m sure the fucker deserved it. Darner Vosque has been nothing but trouble since he joined. Someone needed to teach him a lesson.”

Charley nodded before turning back to the sink. The hot water was still pooled there. “Glad to be of assistance.”

Cupping her hand, she filled it with the liquid and splashed it on her face. It scalded, but it was oddly comforting. The pain reminded her that she was human, that she was alive. That she could still feel. Water dripped from her chin and back into the ceramic bowl. The sound it made was the only thing to break the silence. When Charley glanced into the mirror again, she was surprised to see Zaeed hadn’t left.

“You going to be ok, kid?” He actually sounded like he cared.

Was she going to be ok?

She wasn’t at the moment, that much she knew. She’d lost too much too fast and didn’t know how to handle it. But was she going to be ok?

Yeah, she was. There was no way that she couldn’t be. Charley Shepard was a survivor. And that’s what she was going to do.

Survive.


	5. Omega

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I worry for that fire in her eyes, it’s in her heart too, I swear it." — Elaine Octans

When picturing Omega, Charley believed it to be a planet with lush and plentiful farms, with a bustling marketplace, a place where people did normal everyday things. It wasn’t. Omega was a space station built into an asteroid and was famous for its eezo mining and crime. The mining of the eezo had hollowed out most of the asteroid, giving people room to build homes to live in, but their lives were difficult. Laughter was in short supply. From the windows of the Blue Suns starship, Omega had resembled a mushroom cloud, the red glow of its lights almost eerie in the nothingness of space. When she had finally stepped onto the space station, the smell of sewage and smoke nearly choked her. The atmosphere was noxious and definitely not for those with a weak stomach.

Zaeed Massani walked ahead of her, whistling a tune she’d never heard before. His steps were brisk, his heavy armor not slowing him. He had turned a corner when a voice echoed in the small hallway.

“Zaeed!”

Charley hadn’t even caught up to the mercenary when Zaeed responded. “Bray, you son of a bitch! Still working with Aria, eh?”

When she finally did reach Zaeed’s side, Charley’s gaze landed on the man that her savior was shaking hands with. Her reflexes kicked in before she knew what was happening. Pulling the pistol from the holster at Zaeed’s waist, she cocked the hammer before aiming it at the alien in front of her. The sound of the gun alerted both men. Zaeed raised an eyebrow at her reaction. The batarian, however, reached for his own weapon, pausing when Charley’s finger covered the trigger.

“Don’t move.” She hissed, not trusting the alien to listen, but warning him anyway. “I know how to use a gun and don’t think I won’t blow your fucking head off.”

Zaeed held his hand out for the weapon, unperturbed by her words or actions. “Kid…”

Charley hesitated, battling with herself on how to proceed. Zaeed had saved her from batarians on Mindoir, He hadn’t hesitated to blow them away then, but this one… Her head was reeling with possibilities  and she couldn’t move, couldn’t think. Her heart told her to shoot, but her mind stalled her.

“He’s not one of them. You can trust me.” Zaeed assured her, the look in his eyes saying more than his words. He hadn’t given her a reason not to trust him. Not yet, at least. “Give me the gun.”

Charley blinked at his words, almost as if they hadn’t registered. She didn’t fight when Zaeed took the gun from her grip and returned it to his waist. Then he placed a hand on her shoulder.

“This is Bray. He works for the leader of Omega. She is going to help you get back home. If that’s what you want.” Zaeed glanced over his shoulder at Bray. “Tell Aria that I want to use my favor to get the kid to the Citadel. She’ll know what that means.”

Bray nodded without a word, his eyes still on Charley. He clearly wasn’t going to trust her either.

Zaeed took Charley by the shoulders and forced her to look at him. When she finally did, she saw apprehension in his blue eyes. “Listen, kid. I got some shit I gotta get done while I’m here. Can you meet me here in about an hour? I wanna say bye before you leave.”

“What if I don’t want to go? What if I want to stay with the Suns?”

Zaeed looked surprised by the question, but it didn’t stop the frown that appeared. “Talk to Aria first, kid. Then make a decision.”

“Sure.” She didn’t respond with any enthusiasm, but she didn’t think Zaeed expected her to.

He left her a moment later, a smile on his face that was obviously meant to reassure her, but when he turned away, she saw sadness in his eyes. It was almost as if he didn’t want her to leave, but knew in his heart that it was the best for her. She watched as the mercenary disappeared into the dark tunnels of the space station.

“Favor?” She asked the batarian, refusing to meet his gaze. When she looked at him, she remembered Mindoir, remembered the men who destroyed her family. She wasn’t ready to think about it yet.

Bray snorted before walking down the same tunnel Zaeed had ventured down. Charley followed him quickly. “Don’t ask. Believe me. It’s not something you want to know.”

Charley took the advice and didn’t ask again.

Afterlife was a nightclub that also doubled as the command center for Omega’s de facto leader, Aria T’Loak. Many different types of alien species danced and drank... among other things. There was stuff happening in booths that Charley would have to erase from her memory. Loud music pumped through speakers, making the club feel alive. If Mindoir hadn’t happened, if she had been her old self, Charley might have actually enjoyed the place. All she could think about was finding a way to make the slavers pay.

“Hey, kid!” A voice called out as she walked past a handful of booths. Charley’s dark gaze landed on a pair of Blue Suns mercenaries. She’d seen them on the ship the day she’d arrived. She hadn’t noticed them since, however, and was surprised that they even recognized her at all.

“ _ What _ ?” It came out harsher than even she expected.

The man watched her with cautious eyes, but his companion didn’t have any qualms about Charley’s attitude. The woman tossed her blonde hair over her shoulder, large blue eyes peering up at Charley. She smiled brightly before bringing a beer to her lips. This woman didn’t possess the type of personality that Charley expected a mercenary to have. She was too…  _ happy _ .

“You’re the one who smashed Vosque’s face into the bathroom stall, right?” The man’s question was curious, but his countenance wary.

The inquiry put Charley on edge. “Why are you asking?”

The blonde nearly spilled her drink as she leaned forward. “That son of a bitch needed to be taught a lesson.”

The man draped an arm around the woman’s shoulders before pulling her against him, chuckling at her enthusiasm. “What Izzy is trying to say is thank you.”

Charley lifted an eyebrow, confused at the kindness they were showing her. “You are thanking me for… injuring one of your people? Why?”

“Because no one else was going to do it and it needed to be done.” The man replied, his voice signalling the end of the conversation.

Izzy didn’t take the hint. “Are you joining the Suns? You totally should.”

Bray approached the booth where Charley stood, clearly irritated with the diversion. “Look, kid, if you ever want to get off of this damned space station, you need to follow me.”

Charley nodded, but her mind was still on the couple as she followed the batarian once again. They’d been impressed by her. That was unexpected. Perhaps she  _ should  _ consider joining the Suns. Her thoughts were interrupted by the appearance of a purple skinned woman… with tentacle type protrusions coming from her head. Charley had never seen an asari before, but she certainly hadn’t expected  _ that _ .

“So you’re the kid that Zaeed was telling me about in his messages?” Aria’s blue eyes inspected her, but she didn’t move from the couch she was lounging on. “You don’t look like you could beat the shit out of a fully trained merc.”

Charley’s face didn’t register a single emotion. “You don’t look like someone who can control an entire criminal organization.”

Aria’s bodyguards were silent, but their discomfort was palpable. One moved slightly as if he was prepared to intervene if Charley threatened his boss. It was almost comical to think that a sixteen year old posed a threat to someone as powerful as Aria. None of them relaxed until Aria smirked, almost as if she was proud.

“Zaeed tells me that you want to get to the Citadel. I’m willing to get you there at no cost. Zaeed did something for me years ago and it’s the least I can do to repay him.” Aria motioned for Charley to sit beside her on the couch. “Let’s discuss your options.”

Charley didn’t move. “I don’t want to go to the Citadel.”

“You don’t? That news to me.” Aria laid an arm across the back of her couch and nodded at Charley to continue. “What is it you want?”

“I want to find a ship of batarian slavers. They attacked-”

“Mindoir.” Aria interrupted, her smile gone instantly at the mention of the tragedy. “Why would you want to find them? They destroyed everything.”

“It’s my business.” Charley snapped, crossing her arms over her chest stubbornly. “If you can’t help me, I’ll find someone who can.”

“I never said I couldn’t, but this isn’t an easy thing to do. This will take more than Zaeed’s favor.” Aria met Charley’s gaze, a challenge in them. “The question is… are you willing to do whatever it takes to get to them?”

“I don’t have money.”

“It’s cute that you think I want money.” Aria smiled at her, but it wasn’t friendly like the one she’d had at the beginning of the conversation. This one was calculating. The asari wanted something and she was going to get it. She would get it because Charley was desperate. “No, I want your services. You’re smart. I saw you when you landed. You watch everything. You’re quick and you clearly know how to use a gun. Plus, your size keeps people from looking too closely at you. You’re perfect.”

“What do you want?” Charley may have trusted Zaeed to a point, but she didn’t trust Aria. She didn’t know Aria and aliens were trouble. Mindoir proved that.

“It’s not what _ I  _ want. It’s what  _ you _ want. And what you want isn’t easy to come by. It could takes months, years even. I need to know that I’ve invested my time and resources wisely.” Aria motioned for Bray to approach her. “You’re going to do a little work for me. You have access to the Blue Suns starship. You have access to their people. You’re the perfect mole.”

“Mole? You want me to spy on the people who saved my life?” Charley couldn’t believe her audacity.

“You think they saved your life? You’re giving credit where none is due, kid.” Aria whispered something in the batarian’s ear. When Bray disappeared into Afterlife’s crowd, her gaze returned to the young human. “According to Zaeed, Vido wanted to throw you out of the airlock as soon as they left Mindoir. The old man thought he was doing you a favor by giving you over to me.”

Charley frowned. She hadn’t known that.

“It’s not the Blue Suns I want the information on... it’s Vido. I want you to find out everything you can about what he’s doing. Any intel you can pass on to me will be an incentive for me to help you.” Aria smiled again, knowing she’d won before Charley even spoke. “Do we have a deal?”

Charley sighed. She would do it, not because she wanted to, but because it was the only way to avenge her parents. Because it was the only way to save Becca.

And because she had no other choice.


	6. Welcome Aboard, Kid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Have no fear, you will find your way. It’s in your bones. It’s in your soul." — Mark Z. Danielewski

Charley leaned against the wall of the hallway and waited for Zaeed to reappear. The cast on her hand felt itchy and irritating. It took all of her willpower not to grab something long enough to stick between the plaster and her broken hand. She didn’t know how much longer she would be forced to wear it but if she didn’t get it off soon, she’d rip it off herself.

The familiar sound of Zaeed’s footsteps greeted her ears. His wasn’t the only set coming in her direction, but his were the only ones that mattered. Moving to stand, Charley watched as he rounded the corner with the Afterlife pair from earlier. The blonde was situated underneath the arm of her boyfriend, his olive green eyes widening in a surprise when he noticed Charley.

“Hey, kid.” Zaeed greeted her, an expectant grin on his face. Charley had a suspicion that he’d spoken to Aria and knew what she was going to say. “Come to say goodbye?”

She would have rolled her eyes if the smile on her face hadn’t already ruined everything. “No, but I’m sure you already knew that.”

The short blonde woman’s eyebrows came together in confusion. “I don’t understand what-  _ ooooh _ .” Figuring out what was happening halfway through her question, she began to jump up and down in  overwhelming excitement. Her boyfriend dropped his arm and glared at her. She just ignored him. “Oh my… You’re coming with us!”

Charley couldn’t help it. She laughed. It was strange to hear. She hadn’t thought herself capable of such a thing anymore. But there it was: a laugh coming from deep in her chest.

Without warning, the tiny blonde mercenary threw her arms around Charley and hugged her tightly, squealing the entire time. Even her twin had never acted in a such a way before. It was a new experience, but surprisingly not unwelcome. She even hugged her back. 

Charley could admit that the happiness was infectious.

“Izzy- let the girl breathe.” Her boyfriend muttered, smirking at the scene in front of him. It was obvious anything that made his girl happy was worth smiling about. 

Izzy pulled away, grinning like it was her birthday. “I’m so happy. We’re going to be the  _ best _ of friends.” Suddenly, she grabbed her boyfriend by the hand and began to drag him to where the ship was docked. “Ny- we have to tell everyone!”

Charley was going to mention that maybe that wasn’t the best idea considering not  _ everyone _ liked her, but she couldn’t get a word in before Izzy and her boyfriend had disappeared. Zaeed chuckled in the silence that was left behind. 

Eying him curiously, Charley waited for his laughter to subside. “What’s so funny?”

“I had a fifty-fifty shot at being right about you.” Zaeed explained, waving for her to accompany him down the hall. She followed without hesitation. “Either you’d stay with the Suns or you’d accept Aria’s ship back to the Citadel.”

“There was a third option.” 

Zaeed quietly glanced at her in interest. 

“I could have stayed on Omega. Joined up with one of the gangs. Resorted to a life of crime.” The irony of her response was not lost on her. 

It wasn’t lost on Zaeed either. “Well, we wouldn’t have wanted that. A young girl like you joining criminals. No, that wouldn’t do at all.”

Charley grinned. It was as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders briefly. She still had a lot to do before she could finally find peace with what happened to her, but at least she was on a path that she was happy with. Once they’d arrived at the docking bay to the Blue Suns ship, Zaeed clapped her on the shoulder, a wide grin on his face.

“Welcome aboard, kid.”

….

“Is this a joke?” Vido asked, his eyes going from Zaeed to Charley and then back again. “Tell me this is a joke, Massani.”

“No joke.” Zaeed muttered, crossing his arms and staring at his friend. If Charley was in Vido’s position, she might have been intimidated by her fellow mercenary, but it was clear that Vido either didn’t care about the threat or he didn’t even notice it. “The kid is coming with.”

“The fuck she is.” He snapped, pointing a finger directly in Zaeed’s face. “She is off at the next stop or I’m spacing her.”

Zaeed grabbed Vido’s hand and the latter yelped. From the look of Zaeed’s grip, it had to hurt like hell. Charley grimaced, torn over whether she wanted her savior to break the hand or not. “Charley is staying, deal with it.”

Once Zaeed let go of Vido’s hand, the other man cradled it close to his chest. He shot daggers with his eyes at Zaeed as he did so, but he didn’t fight him on the issue anymore. “If she is staying, then she  _ will  _ be useful.”

“I can cook-”

Vido’s furious gaze fell on her, cutting off her words before she could even finish speaking. “You’ll join the others in the pit.”

“ _ What? _ ” With a clenched fist, Zaeed took a threatening step in Vido’s direction, murder in his eyes. “She’s just a kid, Vido. You can’t seriously think-”

“If the  _ kid  _ wants to be a mercenary so badly, then she’ll be a fucking mercenary. It’s the pit or she’s out.” Vido spat out. It was obvious which option he preferred. Charley was certain that she would be floating in the vacuum of space by the end of the night. 

Once Vido left them, Charley met Zaeed’s worried eyes. “What’s the pit?”

Zaeed sighed, running a hand over his face wearily. “A fighting pit. It’s a fighting pit.”


	7. Strength Beneath Pain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "And men said that the blood of the stars flowed in her veins." — The Silver Chair, by C. S. Lewis

********

A fist connected with her stomach, doubling her over onto the mat. Her whole body ached as she struggled to breathe, black spots dancing in her vision. Once able to take a full breath again, Charley rolled onto her back, closing her eyes and enjoying the cool mat against her sweaty skin. 

“We’re not done.” The voice hovered above her, sounding not even close to breathless. If Charley had the strength, she would have extended her middle finger as a greeting. Instead, she groaned.

“Izzy, give the kid a break. You’ve been beating on her for nearly three hours.” 

Nydo, bless the man, had been supportive over the last few days. He had lost his entire family during the First Contact War, the turians bombing his city with little regard for the civilians that lived there. He was old enough to remember the mangled bodies of his family in great detail. Charley didn’t know how he worked with turians so closely now, but when she asked, he’d only shrugged the question away.

“Give her a break?” Izzy was barely controlling her frustration. “You do realize that Vido expects her in the ring tomorrow, right? If she can’t handle  _ me _ , she sure as hell won’t be able to handle whatever her opponent throws at her.”

“Z-”

“They won’t be as kind as I’m being, Ny. Vido will make sure of that.” Izzy snapped. By her tone, she was done arguing with him. 

Despite the pain she was in, Charley knew that Izzy’s words were correct. She might be hurting now, but it wasn’t even close to what she’ll be feeling tomorrow. It was obvious that Vido had it out for her and there wasn’t much that Zaeed or his friends could do to protect her from his fury. She had to protect herself.

“She’s right.” Charley had managed to get to her feet. Her abdomen throbbed because of the movement, but she ignored her discomfort, her eyes on where Nydo and Izzy stood. They were glaring at each other, neither bothering to look at her. “If I don’t learn, I’ll probably die. I didn’t survive Mindoir to die now.”

Izzy lifted her eyebrows in surprise, yet when she looked at Charley, all the young girl could see was approval on the mercenary’s face. 

Lifting her arms again, Charley prepared to take another beating. “Now, I thought you said we weren’t done. What are you waiting for?”

Izzy laughed, brushing her blonde hair out of her eyes. “Zaeed was right about you, Charley. You’re a pistol. You’ll do great here. I don’t doubt it.”

Charley let a small grin pull at her lips, grateful that Zaeed had faith in her. It would made the next few hours bearable. Izzy motioned to Charley to get into position. Once she complied, the mercenary threw a punch that was easily dodged.

“You need to remember that your cast is considered a weapon.” Izzy huffed, blocking a hit from Charley. “If Vido sees you using it, he’ll disqualify you.”

“And probably punish you.” Nydo added from his corner of the room.

Charley nodded, storing the tip in her memory. “No cast. Got it.”

Izzy lifted her hands in front of her body. Nodding towards them, she continued. “Remember that when you throw a punch, you need to put your thumb on the outside of your fist. If you put tuck it inside, you can break it when your fist connects.”

“You’ve already got enough broken bones.” Nydo chuckled at his words. 

Izzy rolled her eyes, but didn’t respond to his taunt. Charley ignored him as well, focused on Izzy’s hands. She did as she was told, making sure her thumb wasn’t folded into her fist. Then she extended her arms, her fist landing squarely in Izzy’s hand. She continued to do this with her right since a cast was still on her left. They sparred until Charley was drenched in sweat, her breaths coming in short gasps.

Izzy let her rest a moment so she took advantage of the reprieve. As Charley flexed her hand repeatedly, she felt the strain on her knuckles, knowing that she would be covered with bruises by tomorrow. She was afraid of what she would look like after her actual fight.

She was halfway through draining a bottle of water when the sound of clapping interrupted the serene silence of the room. When she turned, her eyes slanted at the intruder. His blue eyes watched her with too much appreciation although it gave her satisfaction to see the bright purple bruises covering his once perfect visage. Clenching her fist, Charley forced to stay calm despite the rage she felt.

“What the fuck do you want?” She spat instead, noticing that both Izzy and Nydo were watching the scene with their own glares.

Vosque laughed at her anger, amusement gleaming in those eyes. She wanted to pluck them out and make him eat them, but she resisted, remembering how Vido reacted the first time she’d kicked his ass. “I wanted to see the trainwreck, but surprisingly you aren’t bad in a fight.”

Charley knew the compliment had to have an ulterior motive. All she had to do was wait for it. “Is that so? Does that mean you’ll forfeit the fight?”

His laughs taunted her. “Funny. You think your first fight is against me?” He clucked his tongue and ran a hand through his hair, only messing it up more. Charley figured that was the point. “As if Vido would give you the satisfaction. Besides, you can’t expect to win only knowing how punch  _ into _ hands.”

“That isn’t the only thing I know how to punch,” Charley muttered.

Vosque raised an eyebrow at her, but didn’t comment on the implied threat. He moved closer to her, slowly and deliberately, waiting to see how far he could push her before she snapped. What either of them hadn’t counted on was Nydo interfering.

The older mercenary pushed past Charley, murder in his gaze. When Vosque glanced up at him, his pale features went even paler. 

Vosque took a step back, his hands up in defense. “This doesn’t concern you, Elgrin.”

“Oh, but I think it does, Vosque.” Nydo sneered, leaning close enough to the creep so that he would be forced to meet his eyes. “You came into  _ my _ quarters and attacked  _ my _ charge. What would Zaeed say if he found out that you came here uninvited with the intention of provoking Charley to violence?”

Vosque sputtered, his words barely understandable as he tried to find an excuse. “I don’t- I mean it wasn’t-”

Nydo put a hand on Vosque’s shoulder, digging his nails into flesh hard enough to draw blood. “If you ever bother Charley again, I  _ will  _ end you myself.”

As Vosque hurried out of the room, Izzy lost her composure, giggles erupting from her mouth. She wrapped her arms around Nydo’s waist, pressing her face into his back to stifle the sound. When she was able to speak, only then she did move away.

“ _ That’s _ why I love you.” Izzy said, grinning like mad at him. Then her ice-blue eyes found Charley’s face.

She was smiling, the biggest smile than any she could remember.


	8. The Pit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "She’s a dangerous.. a very dangerous soul; she can fill your mind with sinful desires and rip your heart with her loud silence." —Maram Rimawi
> 
>  
> 
> Content Warning: This chapter had violence, blood, and gore.

Her heart thundered in her chest. Never had Charley been so nervous about something in her entire life. Ignoring the sweat that dripped down her back, she tried to focus her thoughts, knowing that fear had no place in the pit with her. Her broken hand was throbbing from the constant beating she’d taken in preparation for this. Izzy had helped her tie the hair out of her face as a way to help.

Zaeed had stopped by her quarters briefly to wish her luck. It wasn’t much of a pep talk, but Charley hadn’t been expecting one. He believed in her. That was all that mattered. Especially since she was doubting her ability to fight with one hand.

Izzy and Nydo flanked her as they waited for the signal that Charley could enter the pit. Neither spoke as they stood there. Charley figured that they knew there was nothing they could say. Her fate would be determined during this fight and if she failed, she’d be lucky if Vido didn’t shoot her immediately.

Finally, she was allowed to enter the room. A crowd had formed around a small circle etched into the ship’s floor. The mercenaries parted for Charley’s entrance. As she crossed into the space that the Suns had labeled “The Pit”, she glanced around for her opponent. Every muscle in her body screamed in protest as she moved, the soreness from her training still apparent. She noticed Vido watching her with disgust in his gaze, Zaeed silently standing beside him. His blue eyes met hers and he nodded imperceptibly in her direction. She fought back the smile that threatened to appear. She didn’t need to further anger Vido. She would wait until after the fight to do that.

A movement to her left caught her attention. Turning, she froze at the sight of the alien she’d be fighting. A batarian. Of course, it was. It made sense that Vido would make this as difficult for her as possible. Why not make her fistfight an alien that looked so much like the ones that had slaughtered her family and ruined her life?

Her body refused to move and it took everything she had to keep the trauma from rendering her useless. She would not give Vido the satisfaction of watching her fail. She would defeat the batarian, smash his face in if she had to, only to prove she was as strong as the rest of them.

The batarian’s many eyes widened at Charley’s appearance before glancing at Vido and Zaeed, obviously confused. The alien probably wasn’t expecting a short teenager to fight him unarmed. That confusion and uncertainty would be an advantage for her. If the batarian wasn’t willing to hurt her, or to even fight, Charley would make short work of him. As hopeful as she was that this would be the case, Mindoir had taught her better. Aliens didn’t care who they hurt. They just liked inflicting pain and creating death.

Well, she could do the same.

Lifting her fists, Charley slowly approached the batarian, waiting for him to make a decision. He glanced once more at Vido before deciding to continue with the fight. He watched her warily for a moment, trying to decide if she was a threat or not. As they circled each other, the crowd was getting restless, jeering and mocking them when no one attacked.

Finally, the alien struck. He swung a fist at her head that she easily ducked. When she faced him once more, she could see the irritation on his face. 

“Did you think this was going to be easy?” She asked him, cocking an eyebrow at his expression. “I don’t think so, ugly.”

The batarian let out a frustrated growl, swinging again to the sound of cheers from the crowd. The fist connected this time and she cursed, stumbling back when an image flashed through her mind.

_ The sound of a gunshot echoed in the near silence. The world moved in slow motion as her mother dropped to the ground.  _

Her breath hitched, momentarily blinded as she returned to the present. She glanced up just in time to see the batarian reach for her. Quickly, she crouched beneath his arms, the palm of her hand connecting with his neck. Choking, he stumbled away from her, his hands protecting his neck from more blows.

_ Coughing against the poisonous fumes, she stumbled out of the building, her eyes searching for both enemies and her sister at the same time. _

Trying to clear her head of the flashbacks, Charley stepped forward, only to lose her balance and fall to her knees. The jolting pain gave her something to focus on and as she stared at the metal floor of the spaceship, she saw blood drip from her nose, leaving little red splatters on the ground. She lifted a hand to wipe the blood away, hissing at the excruciating pain of her broken nose. Everything hurt, but she refused to let it make her weak. She could do this. She  _ had _ to.

The batarian had recovered enough to approach again. Izzy screamed her name from somewhere in the crowd. She couldn’t tell which direction, but it reminded her that she had people in her corner. People who believed in her. The alien grabbed a fistful of the hair that had fallen from her ponytail. Dragging her across the floor, Charley’s bare legs rubbed against the metal, burning her skin. 

Without thinking about how much it would hurt, Charley moved her legs beneath her, letting her feet find the ground so she could partially stand. Then she pulled her head the opposite direction hard enough for a chunk of her thick ebony hair to be left dangling in the batarian’s hand when she pulled free. He glanced down in shock at the bloody mess of hair that he still held and Charley took advantage, ignoring the awful pain that radiated through her skull.

Lifting her leg, she kicked the batarian in the chest, sending him to the ground with a loud thud. She climbed on top of him and began to alternate punches, not caring if her cast got her disqualified. She could feel the bones in her hand shatter again and with each punch, her castless hand splitting at the knuckles.

_ She hit the ground, dazed, her vision going black for a moment. When her eyes adjusted, she felt a throbbing pain in the back of her head. One of her mother’s murderers stood over her, a gun in his hand, her blood dripping from the metal. _

Charley’s flashback disappeared when a strong pair of arms lifted her from the batarian. She turned to punch whomever had touched her, when a pair of strong hands stopped her. Glancing up through the mess of hair and blood that was now her face, she could see kind blue eyes making note of each wound.

Zaeed pulled her away from the crowd that had descended on the unmoving batarian. The mercenaries had lost control at the sight and had all begun to punch each other while others must have gone to check on the alien’s condition. Charley had no idea if her opponent was dead or not, and in that moment she didn’t care. She just wanted to be as far away from the scene as possible before she passed out from the pain.

“You’re ok, kid.” Zaeed’s voice whispered in her ear. Screams were followed by the sounds of struggle. She couldn’t see what was happening, but she figured it was chaos. It sure sounded like it. “Your eyes went blank there for a minute. I thought I lost you.”

Charley almost responded that he did, but she bit her lip. If she spoke, she might start crying and that was the last thing she wanted these people to see. Zaeed finally got her to the place that she slept most nights, locking the door behind them so that no one could enter unless they allowed it. She sat on the lower bunk, her eyes staring at the empty wall across from her. She knew that Nydo and Izzy were there somewhere. She could hear them muttering things she couldn’t understand, but nothing mattered but her pain in that moment. Not just her physical pain, either.

Her family was gone. This entire revenge plot was futile. She would never find the slavers. She would fail like she did everything else in her pathetic life.

She put her head in her hands, letting the pain and weariness overwhelm her. Another memory flashed through her mind as she tried to relax. 

_ Becca’s screams faded as one of the men dragged her away. She could see the blood on the grass beside her. Was it hers or Becca’s? She didn’t know. _

Those screams would haunt her for the rest of her life.

Something cold and sticky pressed against the wound in her head and she hissed, jumping away from the sensation. 

“Hey.” Izzy’s gentle voice immediately calmed her. “I need to clean the head wound or it’ll get infected. It’s going to hurt, but it needs to be done.”

Charley stared at her for a moment, trying to comprehend the words before tilting her head toward the mercenary and letting her word. She grimaced at the awful pain, but at least it distracted her from her thoughts. The door to the room opened, revealing Zaeed as he hurried back in. She had no idea when he’d left, but everything was beginning to blur together. She needed sleep.

Zaeed stopped in front of where Charley sat, staring down at her in awe. “You did it, kid.”

Izzy stopped applying pressure to the head wound at those words. Charley had no idea what he was talking about. “Did what?”

Zaeed smiled proudly, like a father would a daughter. Charley’s heart tugged at a memory that she refused to relive. “Vido was fucking impressed. You’re a Sun.”


	9. Reckless

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "She’s like smoke: you think you’re seeing her clearly enough, but when you reach for her there’s nothing there." —Ryū Murakami
> 
>  
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> TW: This chapter has excessive violence, gore, and death.

Zaeed’s voice buzzed over the headset. “Jentha says you’ve got resistance ahead. Nydo’s backup is on the way.”

Charley Shepard was pressed against the wall behind her, inching her way down the tight hallways of the underground compound. Old fluorescents flickered every few seconds, leaving the compound transitioning between darkness and light. It would have been fascinating to watch if her life wasn’t on the line.“How many?”

“Five. All of them heavily armed. Be careful.”

Charley had been an official Blue Suns mercenary for less than six months. Most of that time was spent in what Vido had called “intensive training.” In reality, she’d been stuck fighting in the pit most nights, training her body to withstand some of the worst pain she’d ever felt. Even after winning majority of the battles she’d faced, it had taken over three months before Vido finally outfitted her for her first mission. Zaeed assured her that this was normal. Charley knew that was a lie. Vido didn’t trust her and probably never would. 

The information on the Blue Suns leader she’d given to Aria was sparse. She knew that the asari wasn’t particularly happy about her lack of progress, but there was nothing she could do about that at the moment. Vido refused to let Charley know anything about the Blue Suns and she had made few friends among the ranks. The only people she might consider giving the title of friend to was Zaeed, Izzy, and surprisingly, even Nydo. 

_ Five _ . Charley calculated the risk of going in alone. Two or three she could handle, but five heavily armed guards? That was suicide.

She smirked. Zaeed wouldn’t be able to see it, but he would sure as hell be able to hear it in her voice. “I’m heading in.”

“What? Charley?  _ Fuck _ -”

Charley cut the link between her and Zaeed before crouching against the wall. A few more steps and she was outside of a closed door. She could hear the muffled voices of the guards on the other side. They were the only thing between her and the weapons that the Suns had come to ‘reacquire.’ If she pulled this off, then Vido would have to acknowledge her skills. If she didn’t, well then she’d be dead and there was really nothing to worry about after that.

After double checking that her assault rifle was fully loaded, Charley took a deep breath to calm her nerves. She could do this. She’d taken on bad odds in the past and she’d come out of it alive. This would be the same. She glanced up as a shadow moved past the door. It was now or never.

Moving to the opposite side of the door, she pressed herself against the wall again. She didn’t want to be seen when the door opened. It would give her a few seconds to react. Then she gripped the door handle.

The door swung open quickly, hitting the wall with a resounding thud. It drew the attention of the guards, each preparing to unload their weapons into the enemy. When the first man’s foot crossed the threshold, Charley struck. The butt of her rifle connected with his face. He dropped his gun to hold his head and she kicked it away, watching it slide down the hall and out of his reach. Grabbing him by arm, she spun him around to face the room he was exiting, placing him in a chokehold before raising her own gun.

Their immediate response was to fire. The man in her grip took the bullets in the chest, but she cursed, realizing she wouldn’t be able to hold him forever. She let a few rounds off into the nearest guard. He went down quickly. She dropped the man she held, letting him crumple in a heap in the doorway. She took cover behind the wall once more, bullets flying through the open door.

Slinging the rifle over her shoulder, Charley reached to her belt for a knife. She knew another guard wouldn’t step through the door, but she had a plan. She secured the blade between her teeth before grabbing a hold of her gun. Counting to five in her head, Charley rolled over the dead body and took cover behind a crate. Gunfire echoed in the small space and she tried to estimate how many bullets were fired before leaving cover.

A few rounds from the pistol at her hip ended the life of the closest man. As he dropped, she rushed the man behind him. Her knife sank into the flesh of his neck, blood oozing around the blade as the artery she cut bled out. The man clutched his throat and toppled over, choking as the blood left his body. The final guard lifted his gun to shoot again and Charley dropped to her knees, throwing the knife as she did so. The blade embedded itself in the guard’s torso, missing the heart, but it made him stagger giving Charley enough time to end his life with a bullet to the head.

As the men finally met their deaths, Charley found herself left with only silence. It made the sound of her heartbeat that much more noticeable. Her pulse pounded in her ears, the sound deafening everything around her. Adrenaline was the only thing that kept her from falling over. Wiping the sweat from her brow with shaking hands, she stood. There was no one left alive in the room. The crates with the guns in them were secure. Perhaps a little bloody, but secure nonetheless.

Charley turned her headset back on and prepared for the onslaught of colorful cursing from Zaeed but the comm was blissfully silent. Once her knife was wiped clean of blood and clipped on her belt, she checked the cargo. The sight of the shining black metal of the guns was worth almost dying for.

Footsteps in the hallway caught her attention and she lifted her rifle, prepared to end the life of any other guard that attempted to stop her. She didn’t have to worry, however, as the familiar sight of the Suns blue and white armor appeared.

Nydo proceeded Zaeed into the small room, his shotgun lifted and prepared to shoot if need be. When his olive green eyes noticed the death that littered the room, he lowered her weapon and raised an eyebrow at Charley. “Showoff.”

Zaeed followed Nydo into the room, but didn’t look as pleased as he did. The older mercenary approached, furious. “What the _ fuck _ did you think you were doing? I explicitly told you to wait for backup!”

“I had a chance and I took it.” She didn’t want Zaeed to know that she was disappointed in his reaction because that would mean she actually cared about it in the first place. That would make her weak. She wouldn’t be weak. Not anymore.

Zaeed sighed, closed his eyes, and turned away from her. “I don’t want to argue about this right now. Help load the guns. I have to talk to Vido.”

Zaeed left Nydo, Charley, and a few more of the Suns to load the guns. And the entire time, all Charley could think about was what about this situation had gone wrong.


End file.
